Most mothers bring their bundle of joy into the world with the expectation of being able to breastfeed their infant and indeed, many succeed after delivery. Approximately 76.5% of women in the United States successfully breastfeed their child at birth. However, some are unable to continue as time goes by. The rate drops to 49% at 6 months. According to a survey by the Department of Health and Human Services, only 16.4% of new mothers are exclusively breastfeeding at 6 months.
In honor of the 2013 World Breastfeeding Week, download a complimentary copy of “Crazy For Milk” here and take a peek at the non-textbook realities of motherhood.
Could the example set by the Duchess of Cambridge with the Royal Baby help reduce the stigma of breastfeeding and lessen the number of mothers who give up nursing shortly after leaving the hospital? How important is it for public figures to set the tone?
The Duchess of Cambridge is reportedly successfully breastfeeding newborn Prince George after a shaky start, following recent traditions set by Princess Diana and the Queen Mother. The efforts of public figures in setting the example are an ongoing source of inspiration for new mothers to persevere with their own efforts of nursing, especially when for centuries in the past, royal babies were traditionally handed over to wet nurses soon after birth.
The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that breastfeeding continue for at least 12 months, and thereafter for as long as mother and baby desire. But the latest data showed only 47.2% of moms were still nursing their babies at 6 months and only 25.5% at 12 months.
Despite the numerous benefits, many new mothers give up nursing due to the stigma of breastfeeding – their fear of being able to nurse their babies discreetly in public; their reluctance to deal with society’s perception that breastfeeding in public is inappropriate despite the many laws passed in the United States that protect a woman’s right to breastfeed in any place, public or private, as long as she’s authorised to be there; or the lack of support from their employer to enable them to express their milk while at work.
So, how can every mom be expected to continue nursing her child when she is confronted with this stigma at every turn? …Read more
I had heard all the stories, the old wives’ tales, the dos and the don’ts.
I had read books and researched materials on the Internet.
I made sure I bought everything I could think of beforehand — the baby clothes, the baby bottles, the diapers, the diaper rash medication, the lotions, the soaps and the baby cot.
I planned upfront all the housework that needed to be done and did as much as I could before I entered the labour room so there would be less to do when I got home with her.
I had even meditated and got myself into a Zen-like-state so that I would be as ready as I could be to bring her into this world.
I wanted to be ready.
I had thought I was ready.
I really believed I was ready.
That is, until the milk came.
Every new mother lives in fear – about her newborn baby’s health, growth and development; about her relationship with her spouse; and even about going back to work after her maternity leave is over. How is she going to juggle it all? “Can you blame her? Every millennium mom wants to have it all – to be the perfect parent, spouse and employee. Which career-oriented woman wouldn’t want to be successful like Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook’s COO? She’s #6 on Forbes List of Power Women now. But the truth is, it doesn’t matter which stage of her career she is at – she can’t help but worry about her work-life balance once she’s back at work.”
Sure, but does it affect all women?
In the United States, 55% of mothers returned to work six months after they gave birth as compared to a mere 14 percent in the early 1960s. Not all moms can afford to stay at home. New parents in the United States are only guaranteed their jobs for 12 weeks after the arrival of a new baby, thanks to the Family Medical Leave Act of 1993 (FMLA) and they even don’t have to be paid during that time.
With June to September being the busiest baby season every year, it’s no surprise that many moms-to-be are now busy preparing for their coming bundle of joy … but with barely enough time to adjust to sleep deprivation, breastfeeding, physical changes in her body and the newcomer in her life, will the working mom be prepared to return to work in such a short span of time?
It’s not going to be easy but it’s definitely not impossible.
Every mother tries to prepare as best as she can but with a baby that’s less than six months old, how can a millennium mom achieve a healthy work-life balance once she is back at work?
Make time for yourself – When mom is happy, everyone else is happy. The family appreciates your sacrifices but your own personal well-being is also important. You need to carve out a few moments for yourself amidst all the demands of your everyday life, even if it is as simple as exercising, reading a book or relaxing in a hot bath.
Let go of the guilt – Forget the housework for a few minutes. Put down the computer. Stop checking e-mails. Schedule some time to just play with your little one and enjoy those precious moments.
Know why you work – According to the Pew Research Center, 86% of working moms sometimes/ frequently feel stress. Identifying and remembering the key reasons why you need to work – ambition, financial necessity or independence – will help you remain focused in times of stress.
Spend quality time with your significant other half – He deserves some of your attention too. Don’t forget to take care of your relationship with him. Getting a babysitter and/or hiring a cleaning service will buy you precious moments alone with him, without stretching yourself further by sacrificing your sleep or time.
You are not alone – By creating a support group amongst other mothers / women in the community, you can develop friendships and help each other as well as reduce the stress and loneliness of having to do it all by yourself.
Be thankful – Find happiness today and don’t be buried by the daily struggles. Look forward to the future for your family.
Redefine your expectations – Don’t let your dream of being the perfect mom stress you out and bury you in guilt. Remember: “You may be only one person in this world, but to one person … you are the world.”
I came across this site recently, womenshealth.gov, a project of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services Office on Women’s Health.
It contained an interesting fact sheet on Depression During and After Pregnancy, which you can read here.
Did you know that you may experience the following feelings with postpartum depression?
Tired after delivery
Tired from a lack of sleep or broken sleep
Overwhelmed with a new baby
Doubts about your ability to be a good mother
Stress from changes in work and home routines
An unrealistic need to be a perfect mom
Loss of who you were before having the baby
Less attractive
A lack of free time
It is sad when many times, these emotions are not given sufficient credibility by both the mother experiencing them and the people around her, leaving her to feel alone, misunderstood and inadequate.
Love yourself.
Love your partner.
Love your child.
Awareness helps.
READ the first Bedroom Secrets novel, Crazy for Milk, now available on AMAZON! Click HERE to get your own copy!
I was drowning in milk. Breast milk, to be exact. It was hard enough trying to be a good mother and wife while learning to breastfeed for the first time. Now, I had to deal with a husband who wanted sex! With me. In this condition.
It is indecent. Scandalous even, this behavior he expects from me. What if someone finds out? What will they think of me?
He won’t like it if I keep turning him down but what if I give in … and I grow to like it?
Sneak a peek into how this new mother feels:
“Nursing Emma on the rocking chair, my frustration grew as I realized that he was punishing me for rejecting him, for not submitting to his demands and for insisting on doing things my way. I hated it when he tried to dictate how I should live my life and yet, it was this same strength in him — the ability to make decisions, to lead — that drew me to him in the first place. I wanted him to respect my right to make decisions for this family too but somehow or another, I had ended up pushing him further away.”
Catch a preview for yourself in the Free Book Previews section
Kathryn Michaels 